If you've searched for information about sleep training, you've encountered a confusing mix of advice, warnings, and emotional appeals. Some sources claim sleep training damages babies forever. Others insist it's completely harmless. Amid all the noise, what does science actually say? This comprehensive guide examines the most common sleep training myths vs facts to help you make an informed decision for your family.
Myth #1: Sleep Training Causes Emotional Harm
What People Claim
This is perhaps the most common concern: that allowing babies to cry during sleep training causes psychological damage, insecure attachment, or lasting emotional problems.
What Science Says
The most rigorous study on this topic followed 326 children for five years after a randomized controlled trial of behavioral sleep intervention. The researchers measured child mental health, stress hormones, parent-child relationships, and attachment patterns at age 6.[1]
The findings: No evidence of differences between intervention and control families for any outcome. Children who were sleep trained showed no differences in:
- Emotional or conduct behavior scores
- Cortisol (stress hormone) levels
- Parent-child closeness or conflict
- Attachment patterns
- Psychosocial functioning
The study's conclusion: "Parents and health professionals can confidently use these techniques to reduce the short- to medium-term burden of infant sleep problems and maternal depression."[1]
The Verdict
Myth. Rigorous long-term research shows no evidence that behavioral sleep training causes emotional harm when done appropriately.
Myth #2: Sleep Training Damages the Parent-Child Bond
What People Claim
Critics argue that allowing babies to cry, even briefly, breaks trust and damages attachment.
What Science Says
The five-year follow-up study specifically measured attachment outcomes and found no differences between sleep-trained and control groups.[1]
The founders of attachment theory, Mary Ainsworth and John Bowlby, emphasized that secure attachment develops from the overall quality of care, not specific techniques. As quoted in research: "Attachment theory suggests that babies thrive emotionally because of the overall quality of the care they've experienced, not because of specific techniques."[2]
The Verdict
Myth. Research shows no impact on attachment from sleep training. What matters most is overall responsive, attuned parenting.
Myth #3: Sleep Training Doesn't Actually Work
What People Claim
Some argue that sleep training only appears to work because babies learn to stop crying, not because they're actually sleeping better.
What Science Says
A comprehensive review of 52 treatment studies by the American Academy of Sleep Medicine found that 94% reported behavioral interventions were effective, with over 80% of children showing clinically significant improvement maintained for 3-6 months.[3]
The review found strong evidence supporting multiple methods, including graduated extinction, bedtime fading, positive routines, and preventive parent education.
The Verdict
Myth. Sleep training is one of the most effective interventions in pediatric behavioral medicine, with remarkably consistent positive outcomes across dozens of studies.
Myth #4: Crying Elevates Cortisol and Damages the Brain
What People Claim
Some sources cite research showing that crying increases cortisol (the stress hormone), claiming this can cause brain damage.
What Science Says
Normal, healthy babies experience elevated cortisol in many everyday situations—during diaper changes, baths, car rides, and vaccinations. Brief cortisol elevations are a normal part of stress response development and are not harmful.[2]
The concerns about cortisol-related brain damage come from research on children who experienced severe abuse or neglect—chronic, extreme stress that bears no resemblance to temporary protest crying during sleep training.
Importantly, the five-year follow-up study found no differences in cortisol levels or stress regulation between children who were and weren't sleep trained.[1]
The Verdict
Myth. Brief crying does not cause the chronic stress elevation associated with brain damage. Long-term research shows no differences in stress regulation.
Myth #5: Sleep Problems Will Resolve on Their Own
What People Claim
Many parents are told to just wait—that babies naturally grow out of sleep problems.
What Science Says
Research tells a different story. A landmark study found that 84% of children with sleep problems at initial assessment still had persistent sleep disturbances three years later.[4]
Without intervention, sleep problems often persist well into childhood. The researchers concluded: "Early identification of the child with sleep disturbances and timely intervention would help both the child and the family."[4]
The Verdict
Myth. Research shows most sleep problems don't resolve without intervention. Early action prevents years of fragmented sleep.
Myth #6: All Sleep Training Methods Are the Same
What People Claim
Many people assume sleep training means "cry it out"—leaving a baby to cry alone for extended periods.
What Science Says
There are many evidence-based approaches to sleep training, including:[3]
- Graduated extinction: Parents check on the baby at increasing intervals
- Bedtime fading: Bedtime is temporarily moved later and gradually shifted earlier
- Positive routines: Consistent, calming bedtime rituals are established
- Chair method: Parents gradually move farther from the crib over several nights
- Pick-up-put-down: Parents pick up the baby when crying intensifies, then put them down when calm
Different methods work for different families, and all have research support.
The Verdict
Myth. Sleep training encompasses many methods, from very gradual to more rapid approaches. Families can choose what fits their comfort level.
Myth #7: Sleep Training Means Ignoring Your Baby
What People Claim
Critics suggest that sleep training involves cold, unresponsive parenting.
What Science Says
Responsive parenting and sleep training are not mutually exclusive. Sleep training typically involves:[5]
- Ensuring all needs (hunger, comfort, safety) are met before sleep time
- Creating a loving, predictable bedtime routine
- Providing regular reassurance during the learning process
- Responding to genuine distress while allowing protest crying
The goal is teaching babies the skill of independent sleep while maintaining a warm, responsive relationship throughout the day.
The Verdict
Myth. Sleep training is about teaching a skill, not ignoring needs. Responsive parents can and do sleep train successfully.
Myth #8: You Can't Sleep Train a Breastfed Baby
What People Claim
Some suggest that sleep training will harm milk supply or disrupt the breastfeeding relationship.
What Science Says
Breastfed babies can absolutely be sleep trained. Many continue night feeds while learning to fall asleep independently at bedtime. The key is separating the feeding-to-sleep association from the actual nutrition provided by nursing.[3]
Research on sleep training has included breastfed babies, and outcomes are similar regardless of feeding method.
The Verdict
Myth. Breastfeeding and sleep training can coexist. Work with a lactation consultant for feeding-related concerns.
Myth #9: Sleep Training Is Only for Extreme Cases
What People Claim
Some suggest that sleep training should only be used as a last resort for severe sleep problems.
What Science Says
Research supports preventive parent education—teaching sleep habits before problems develop.[3] Many families find that establishing healthy sleep practices early prevents more significant problems later.
Additionally, the benefits of sleep training extend beyond the baby to the entire family. Maternal depression, parental functioning, and family well-being all improve when babies sleep better.[2]
The Verdict
Myth. Sleep training can be beneficial across a range of situations, not just severe cases. Prevention is often easier than intervention.
Myth #10: Sleep Training Is Selfish
What People Claim
Parents are sometimes told that prioritizing sleep is selfish or that good parents sacrifice their own needs.
What Science Says
Chronic sleep deprivation has documented negative effects on parents, including:[2]
- Increased risk of depression
- Impaired judgment and decision-making
- Reduced emotional regulation
- Decreased ability to be patient and responsive
- Increased risk of accidents, including car accidents
Well-rested parents are better able to provide the sensitive, attuned care that children need. Sleep training benefits the entire family.
The Verdict
Myth. Taking care of parental well-being benefits children. Exhausted parents cannot parent at their best.
Fact: The Research Supports Behavioral Sleep Interventions
Across all the sleep training myths vs facts, the pattern is clear: rigorous scientific research consistently supports the safety and effectiveness of behavioral sleep training when done appropriately. The American Academy of Sleep Medicine, after reviewing 52 studies, concluded that these interventions "produce reliable and durable changes."[3]
This doesn't mean sleep training is right for every family, or that there's only one way to do it. But it does mean that parents who choose to sleep train can do so with confidence that they're not harming their child.
Making Your Decision
When evaluating sleep training myths vs facts, consider:
The Quality of Evidence
Look for claims backed by peer-reviewed research, particularly randomized controlled trials and long-term follow-up studies.
Your Family's Needs
Consider the impact of sleep deprivation on your health, relationships, work, and parenting.
Your Comfort Level
Choose a method that aligns with your values and that you can implement consistently.
Your Baby's Needs
Ensure any approach is developmentally appropriate and accounts for your baby's temperament.
How Rose Sleep Co Can Help
At Rose Sleep Co, I help families throughout Southern and Central California navigate the confusion around sleep training with evidence-based guidance. As a sleep consultant certified by the Institute of Pediatric Sleep and Parenting, I stay current on the research and help families find approaches that work for their specific situations.
If you're trying to separate sleep training myths from facts and want personalized support, book a free discovery call at (213) 935-0769 or fill out our intake form.
Your family deserves the truth about what works—and the restful nights that follow.
References
- 1. Price, A. M. H., Wake, M., Ukoumunne, O. C., & Hiscock, H. (2012). Five-year follow-up of harms and benefits of behavioral infant sleep intervention: Randomized trial. Pediatrics, 130(4), 643-651. https://doi.org/10.1542/peds.2011-3467
- 2. Canapari, C. (2015). Sleep Training Doesn't Hurt Your Child. Yale Pediatric Sleep Center. Retrieved from https://drcraigcanapari.com/why-fixing-your-kids-sleep-problems-is-not-selfish/
- 3. Mindell, J. A., Kuhn, B., Lewin, D. S., Meltzer, L. J., & Sadeh, A. (2006). Behavioral treatment of bedtime problems and night wakings in infants and young children. Sleep, 29(10), 1263-1276. https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/17068979/
- 4. Kataria, S., Swanson, M. S., & Trevathan, G. E. (1987). Persistence of sleep disturbances in preschool children. The Journal of Pediatrics, 110(4), 642-646. https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/3559818/
- 5. Lansbury, J. (2011). 7 Reasons to Stay Calm When Babies Cry. Janet Lansbury - Elevating Child Care. Retrieved from https://www.janetlansbury.com/2011/09/7-reasons-to-stay-calm-when-babies-cry/
